PLACE OF POSSIBILITY

Latest Updates: Let Go RSS

• CK 09:20:47 am on August 15, 2009 | 0 | # |
  Tags: +Intention, Center, Energize, Let Go, Manifest, MonkeyMIND

  My aim is to move through my day attending to the thing that feels inspired in the moment.  Sometimes I get worked up about my to do list, my inner-critic’s banter about doing more, etc.

  It takes a little time and attention to return to my inspired place, but always the outcomes are better than pushing to just get something done. After all, I feel better!  Inspired action always feels the best!

  The list never gets done. As Tolle says, "We must become friendly with the present moment," ourselves here and now.  It’s how we can connect with our joy.

  I wish you kind thoughts about who you are here and now, starting with something small in appreciation and moving downstream from there!  Maybe it’s a breath or a walk around the block looking for an appreciative feeling to arise.
  Love, Coyote

  

  Photo:  Time To Pause/Hudson River/iPhone/Coyote Karrick

  Certified Integral Coach . coyotekarrick.com . 206.841.5369 . coyotekarrick@gmail.com

   

• CK 03:15:12 pm on July 31, 2009 | 0 | # |
  Tags: +Intention, Center, Energize, Laugh, Let Go, Meditate, MonkeyMIND, Practice IDEAS, Relax, Think IT

  Fears, a web of worry, a little spiral of stress, negative anticipation, disgruntled feelings, etc…

  We have to do whatever we have to do to stop that train (if we want to feel well and create the opportunities for what we actually want)!

  I have several practices that help me, one I recommend is to simply take a break from excessive thinking, doing, or staring the problem in the face, and sit still.  Call it meditation or whatever you like.  My crazy “monkey” mind got going today, fortunately, I caught myself early and did the following practice:

  PRACTICE IDEA:  Pause and check in on how you are feeling.  If there are worries occupying your thoughts decide to take 5.  Find a place to sit alone if possible, or put in some headphones to cancel out some noise (I’ve done this on the NYC subway).  Set your cellphone or watch for 5 minutes.  Close your eyes and focus on breathing naturally in and out.  Keep all your attention on your breath.  As your mind wanders back into “thinking,” say “thank you” to the reminder to get back to your breath.  When your time is up, say, “Now I’m open to some positive thoughts, I expect to find one then another, and feel better and better.”   Return to the practice anytime you feel stuck, frustrated or hyper-focused on what’s bothering you.  You could also look for some reason to laugh or smile.

  I wish you the best!

  The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.  FDR

  Photo:  Bodega Bay/Coyote Karrick
  

   

• CK 07:00:33 am on June 16, 2009 | 1 | # |
  Tags: Appreciation, Energize, Feel IT, Focus, Let Go, Relax

  This morning I woke up with the same irritated eyes that I experienced the night before.  Allergic!? To this beautiful country-side setting in New England, surrounded by gorgeous plants, flowers, trees, streams, and hillsides…is it true?!  I’m so aware of my discomfort and I start down the thought train:  “I can’t live here,” “I’m not going to be able to get work done today,”  “This is so annoying,”   “What am I going to do,”  “This is driving me crazy,”  “I  look like hell,” etc. etc.   We take our dog, also struggling with his eyes (appears to be losing or lost his eyesight) to the beach on the Hudson.  He loves, sight or no sight, “eating” the waves and we love to watch him.  After heavy rains the past two months it looks like Land Of The Lost (or how I imagine it!); incredibly green mountains jet up out of the river and are met by a 100 foot waterfall that dashes back down through a lush gorge.  It’s beautiful.

  I feel better (physically and emotionally) as my focus shifts from the fears and discouragement about my “eye” reality to other aspects of my reality: happy funny love of a dog, beyond belief beauty, delicious hot coffee, wonderful company, the peaceful sight and sound of a waterfall, and the opportunity of the day ahead.  Within an hour of focusing on the present parts of my reality that comfort and delight, and my hopes and trust in the day and future, I feel like I’m back to being “me.”  Then there’s just love and gratitude.

  What part or parts of your reality do you want to focus on today?

  With Love,

  Coyote

  We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong [happy].  The amount of work is the same.

  -  Carlos Casteneda

   

• CK 07:57:01 am on June 14, 2009 | 0 | # |
  Tags: Forgive, Meditate, Inner-Compass, Let Go, Generation X Y Z...

  From 1995 to 2005, I coached people including hundreds of teens and parents on processes for making decisions, resolving conflict, creating teamwork, and sharing satisfactory life experiences.  I now coach mostly adult individuals, but the subject of creating and maintaining “satisfying relationships” is central to us all.

  Here are some interesting ideas for those of you who want to enjoy your life and relationships a bit or a lot more.  A rather long entry but I think you’ll find some juicy reminders!

  Photo: Self-Expressions/iPhone/Coyote Karrick

  _____________________

  Sarah Newton was trained in “Restorative Justice” during her years as a police officer in the UK and currently is a coach for parents and teens.  Here’s a link to HER BLOG.  The following is a an overview of some of her speaking points from one of her recent radio shows.

  Sarah Newton’s ideas on parenting and creating a peaceful home:
  

  • “It’s not about getting your child to do what you want them to do…it’s not from a control place [that you can really influence your child].”
  • “People don’t fail…systems that we are using fail.  What’s the system here that isn’t working?”
  • “I love conflict because it shows you what’s not working and without it we’d never grow and become a better parent.”
  • “Remember that all we can ever effect is our own reaction…we can’t get someone else to do something we want unless there’s physical force which I’m sure you don’t want.”
  • “As parents we go to these places…how can I ensure my child does what I want them to do?…we have an overriding need to fix our child…we want to win…or to avoid blame…What we can do is just see we went to one of these places [she talks about how she herself can go there too at times]…and move to, ‘How can I restore harmony?’”
  • “To be able to have an impact on [your child] you have to have a connection and relationship.”

  [She recommended the Enneagram to a mother who was struggling to connect with her 20 year old college son and gave her the website: Enneagram Institute].

  • “A lot of conflict is because we don’t understand another person’s point of view and we don’t understand our point of view.  If we use the Enneagram or another resource to start understanding them [and ourselves!], then we stop trying to make their point of view wrong.”
  • “If you haven’t got any kind of communication and relationship going…you can’t use this [restorative justice process].  Work on connection first.” [I'd add here that the first connection needs to be with yourself, with a clear understanding of your feelings, your thoughts, your actions, and how they show up in your energy and bodily reactions too.  Basically before you can connect with anyone else you have to get to a more 'chill' centered place in you!].
    
  • “It’s a collaboration process…and there are boundaries.  For example, your child is swearing at you, that’s a ‘do not swear at me…’   I recommend the ‘choice and state technique.’” [She gives a laundry issue between parent and child - see her website or book for her specific examples].
  • “We can stay really really calm and say, ‘OK I’m not going to this place with you,’…we may try to rationalize and then we throw more fuel on the fire…instead we can say, ‘It may not look fair to you but this is what I will do and this is what I won’t do…this is what’s acceptable and what’s not acceptable [to me]…’”
  • “Remember to put water on the fire.  Start notice what is happening in your body so before you get really wound up and lose it…instead you can stop yourself.”
  • “Take time…I say, ‘I need to go an have a think.’” [She's British].
  • “Ask yourself, ‘Is what I am about to do going to move me closer or further away from my teenager?’  What you might just do is STOP, even if you don’t have something else to do…”
    
  • “Some parents ask everything when it should be a tell, and some tell everything when it should be an ask.  As a parent become very clear between your asks and your tells.  Then your child will become clear…they won’t always try to negotiate with you.”

  [Response to a caller who asked about enforcing curfews]

  • “I don’t like curfews…it’s controlling…I like agreements.  But, when you think of curfew you can ask, ‘What do I really want?’…it’s probably safety that you want.  [She gives this example with her own child]: ‘Here’s what I want…what agreement can we make?’  She’s 11 and she manages her own bedtime.  If she wasn’t able to manage this, I would take this back and say, ‘I’m going to manage your bedtime until we can set up another agreement that works for all of us.’”
  • “I always think you put a remedy in place first and then a penalty.  It’s there to teach them not to punish them.”
  • “I’ve talked to parents that have no rules…hundreds of them…and have no problems with their children.  They have children who have learned how to take responsibility for their own choices.”
  • “When there is conflict:  Aim to reconnect (1st aim).  Not to find blame just connect.”  [I recommend to reconnect in this order:  1st with yourself and your sense of calm center (taking as long as needed), and 2nd with the other person in this case your child.]
    
  • “Accept that conflict is normal [we all see things differently and ALWAYS WILL!], stop blaming, stop going into victim mode, we move into a new place, relaxing, and we stop striving for a conflict free life…it’s natural…Ask, ‘How is this going to grow the relationship?’  If you just stop and ask yourself that question you will find you would do something else.”

  _____________

  Try on this thought, “My child, friend, lover, co-worker, etc., has an inner-compass of their own and it’s not my job to decipher or agree with what they think is best for them.  I make it my job to understand what I want and be as clear as I can be in expressing it through my energy, my words, and my actions.  I can choose to feel good whether I end up influencing them or not.”

  What’s amazing is that people who feel good often do have a wide influence!

   

• CK 08:18:56 am on June 13, 2009 | 3 | # |
  Tags: Center, Generation X Y Z..., Let Go, Meditate, Relax

  Our dog lost most of his eye sight this week. It was sudden and startling for all of us.  However, through the experience we’re learning and remembering some things about his and our own full potential.  I’m being reminded about how good it feels to practice being present, patient, loving, and allowing another being to find their own way.

  Just a minute ago he came down a flight of stairs on his own! I celebrate this accomplishment and I realize how valuable it is for me to sit back some more, maintain a calm center, and let him figure out how to navigate.  At first, we were holding his neck, guiding him and protecting him from knocking into edges.  Now I see that we were crowding and confusing his own sense of things due to our fear (like parents who are acting over-protective or controlling).  He is expressing new skills and shows uncertainty at times, so he does benefit from some encouragement and guidance, like a leash on a unfamiliar trail, and a calm guiding voice.  However, dogs, like kids and adults, respond to our energy and so any guidance we give is only truly helpful if a:  we are centered, and b: they want what we want at that moment.  He does have a mind of his own.

  A little example of how our “energy” gets into the mix:  imagine saying, “It’s OK.”  The simple statement has very different energy from it’s meaning when you are saying it with fear or frustration, then when you simple know and say, “It’s OK.”

  When I have kids I want to remember this experience, take care of my own “energy,” or in other words keep the practice of going back to my “center” where I feel good, calm, and clear.   I also want to give my children guidance when appropriate and the space to have their life experience.  Practices that will help me include:  self-care, centering, meditation, as well as, the belief that we are not here to control or mold another, but let them be and become who they are.

  You may want to ask throughout the weekend, “Is my  ‘help’ coming from my clear and calm center?”  “Is my offering one of pure positive energy or are there attachments to fear, results, etc.?”  “What would happen if I step back and trust more?”

  Love,

  Coyote & Gunner (below)

  

  Photo: Ice Cream For Dogs/iPhone/Coyote Karrick

   

• Welcome To My Blog

  I know that life can be a delicious adventure, so I've embarked on a quest to know it as such through experience. In the process, I'm learning to get out of my own way and laugh more. My intention is not to tell you "the" way, there are many ways and your inner-resources and personal experience can guide you. However, something here may inspire you to seek a direction or follow an idea that already resonates for you. I wish you the best conditions for your life adventure. Love, Coyote Karrick coyotekarrick.com
• There is in each of us so much goodness that if we could see it glow, it would light the world. - Sam Friend
• You might as well decide to start enjoying your life right now, because it’s not ever going to get better than right now–until it gets better right now! - Abraham-Hicks

• Pages

  • DEEP THOUGHTS
  • QUOTES

• Tags

  +Intention Appreciation Career Center Complaints De-Clutter DoingWhatYouLove Energize Feel IT Focus Forgive Generation X Y Z... Get Physical Imagine Inner-Compass Inner-Critic Inspiration Laugh LawOfAttraction Law Of Attraction Let Go Life LOVE Manifest Meditate Money MonkeyMIND Movies Music Naysayers Practice IDEAS Question Relationships Relax Rock Your Walk Romance Think IT True Stories Visualize
• Free your mind, the rest will follow... - En Vogue
• A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
• The greatest revolution of our generation is the discovery that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives. - William James

• del.icio.us
• You are the creator of your experience. What do you want to create now? - Coyote
• The ancestor of every action is a thought. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

• Blog Stats

  • 2,583 hits
• "What's in there?" - Luke "Only what you take with you." - Yoda

• Coyote's Flickr Photos

  More Photos

• Yes, we can to opportunity and prosperity. Yes, we can. Yes, we can change. Yes, we can. Yes, we can heal this nation. Yes, we can seize our future....while we breathe, we will hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubt and fear and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of the American people in three simple words -- yes, we can. -Barack Hussein Obama

• Archives

  Select Month October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008
• The purpose of our lives is to be happy. - Dalai Lama

• Recent Posts

  • Hello World! I hope this finds you well …
  • love comes more naturally to the human h …
  • A friend shares a list of struggles with …
  • My Playlist
  • “There is not a subject of greater impo …
• Truth resides in every human heart, and one has to search for it there, and to be guided by truth as one sees it. – Mahatma Gandhi
• Negative thinking is simply a habit. Positive thinking is simply a habit. - Coyote

• Recent Comments

  	Coyote on QUOTES
  	Coyote on DEEP THOUGHTS
  	Coyote on DEEP THOUGHTS
  	Coyote on DEEP THOUGHTS
  	Coyote on DEEP THOUGHTS

• Open your eyes and look within, are you satisfied with the life you're living? - Bob Marley
• What can any individual do? They can see to it that they feel right. An atmosphere of sympathetic influence encircles every human being. - Harriet Beecher Stowe
• Most people treat the present moment as if it were an obstacle that they need to overcome. Since the present moment is Life itself, it is an insane way to live. Once you have decided you want the present moment to be your friend, it is up to you to make the first move: Become friendly toward it, welcome it no matter in what disguise it comes, and soon you will see the results. One decision changes your entire reality. But that decision you have to make again and again and again - until it becomes natural to live in such a way. - Eckhart Tolle
• Search for:
• In dreams, as in love, all is possible. - Janos Arany

• SocialVibe

  
  
• I consider waking up and living a life designed by my Inner-Compass the biggest adventure of all. - Coyote

• Blog at WordPress.com
  Prologue theme by Automattic